Sunday, April 23, 2006

New Medical Condition

Concerned citizens,

You may well be aware of Mentionitis*. We would like to take this opportunity to educate you on a new condition in order to allow you to prepare yourselves should it reach pandemic proportions.

Attention Infatuation
Condition characterized by liking someone, to any degree of like, based on the attention they afford you. In mild forms of this condition, nonsexual pleasure is derived from someone interacting nicely, positively, and respectfully towards the afflicted person; especially, remembering the person's name and addressing them as such.

(is it wrong to like being paid attention to? is it unhealthy to like the feeling of being memorable?)

*Mentionitis: "A verbal disease whereby the sufferer will be unable to prevent themselves from constantly dropping a particular person's name into conversation. While sufferers themselves are unaware of the significance of this, the frequent, seemingly innocent, references alert friends and indeed partners to an impending romance. "

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Uh-oh. Does being a mentionitis sufferer make me more susceptible to Attention Infatuation? I feel like it might be a risk factor. Help me, Nurse Jacqui!
-rev

JV said...

re: mentionitis as a predisposition to attention infatuation

It is true that there is a relationship between mentionitis and attention infatuation; however, this relationship is not a clear area and thus while it is important and healthy to have an awareness of the conditions and any risk factors you may have, there is no need at this point to be seriously concerned.

As far as our studies have shown to this point, mentionitis is visible in cases of mild attention infatuation. Also, serious cases of attention infatuation are virtually indistinguishable from full-blown cases of mentionitis as both tend to lead to romantic liaisons.

If you find that you are preoccupied with either or both of these conditions to a level that affects your regular daily life, we advise you to consult your family doctor/preferred health care professional.