Dear David,
It is with a heavy heart that i write to inform you of your recent unfortunate loss.
We exhausted all of our abilities but were unable to prevent the loss of your bet. A bet involving a fish.
While we are deeply sorry for your loss, we must inform you nevertheless that your account is still due in full according to the conditions agreed upon by yourself.
Sincerely,
Jane
2 comments:
TO: "Small Town Fever"
ATTN: JV
RE: Your Contribution To A Worthy Cause
Dear JV:
On behalf of the Queen of Procrastination we write to inform you that we are saddened by the lack of recent additions to this site.
We note that The Queen of Procrastination depends on the generosity and kindness of individuals such as yourself to maintain her status as procrastination nobility. We regret to inform you that due to a lapse in this service, the Queen has been reduced to cleaning the toilet and giving the house plant a shower in lieu of perusing this most enjoyable site. While these acts certainly comply with the needs of the Queen, they do not evoke the same tittering, pondering, and general sense of well-being.
Please advise when The Queen of Procrastination may expect resumption of this service. Alternatively, please indicate if it has become subscription based, in which case the Queen is prepared to offer any one of the following:
1) A randomly selected romance novel procured from the laundry room of one Queen of Procrastination; or,
2) Two blurry photographs of a sea gull (taken by QP); or,
3) An unopened box of Tic Tacs (flavour, orange)
Please advise on the foregoing.
We await your response and anxiously anticipate resumption of services.
Yours Truly,
The Queen of Procrastination
per
The Realm of the Queen
why is it that others can go for days, weeks, even MONTHS without posting and i go a mere 4 days and get a write-up?
compliment or criticism?
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